This is going to sound pathetic: being around a bunch of 14-16 year old softball players this weekend completely made me re-evaluate my life, in the best way. I wish I would have cherished my childhood more than I did at the time. Old people were always telling me about how fast life goes and how I should enjoy the spot I was in, but I was young and dumb and I didn’t think they knew what they were talking about what so ever.
And then I grew up.
And now I’m the old person telling all of the naive little girls (who don’t consider themselves little girls) all the things the old people (and by old people I mean people my age) used to tell me.
This weekend I watched these girls play softball and never once did they worry about a message from their boyfriend, or how they smelled, or that they wouldn’t get home until 9:00PM and have school the next morning. They didn’t care about anything excepting winning that Championship (which they did, by the way). I wish I could go back to the days where my biggest fear was striking out or missing a fly ball. When I didn’t have to prepare dinner, or dust the house, or scrub the shower stall. Back to the basics, when life was easy. But I can’t. The reality is none of us can go back. We can only go forward. So that is what I’ll do. It’s what I have to do. But I won’t be stupid! I’ll take what watching those girls taught me.
I’ll stop worrying about not having weekends off. I’ll stop wondering why only 14 people liked the photo I posted on Instagram. I won’t make plans that depend on what other people are doing. I will live for myself. I have to. Nobody else is going to live my life for me, and nobody (nobody worth it, anyway) is going to live their life based on me. So I have to take things into my own hands. I have to find the things that make me happy and go out and do those things.
Eat the donut. Eat the second donut. Stay in my leggings and watch Netflix all day. Drive home to see my parents on a whim. Go to the gym. Pin on my tablet for way too long. Eat all of the pasta. Do the things that make me a happier person, because a happy person is a better person.
I know, from now on, I will be doing these things. I’ll be doing them in strides because change takes time. But I will do them. I will live my life. & I hope you find the courage to live yours, too.
P.S. I do not have kids, but I do have a cat. & he has been tucking himself into bed lately. I got home from the gym today and found this. STOP IT! Why so cute?! (:
until next time,